“Where Are All the Middle-Aged Men”—or, What About Choice?

I really want to enjoy this piece by Lori Day. She makes compelling and relevant points about the state of attraction, in this instance, via online dating sites. Indeed, I fully agree with her that if the majority of men on these sites are seeking only much younger women, then, societally, we have an issue. And I also agree that the reverse—Cougarism—is still deeply frowned upon and mocked. A double-standard wrapped in a grossness tied up in a knot of patriarchy.
However, she loses me by not recognizing that taste and preference need to be acknowledged.
What lead to this piece being written? Her own inability to find profiles of men her age. Because that’s who she was looking for. She states very clearly that she didn’t want a man who looked like her father and she didn’t want a man who was too young.  So, she wanted a middle-aged man.
What if (and I know I’m leaping beyond already agreed on societal issues) even some of those guys who seek younger women are doing it because that is actually their personal preference?
I went through a period where all of my friends were about 10 years younger than me, including one potential romantic interest. We (the lady and the friends) all shared common interests and styles. We went to the same cafes, clubs, shops. It was only natural that that was what I was looking for. People can be naturally inclined to those younger or older than themselves.
I also found it odd that Day allowed “no judgement” that she’d known many women who had married older men. Is that not the same situation? Here, taste and preference is allowed, except for when it then makes the woman’s time difficult in later life?
I’m glad Lori went on to find someone and it has worked out for her. I hope he’s really her type.