The Hook-up: Hipsters Are Boring

I actually started to type that I met Kaitlyn Kochany when I moderated that panel on sex bloggers at Playground. But then I had a “hold on, shut your mouth” moment and remembered that this fantastic writer behind Hipsters Are Boring and a frequent contributor to xoxoamore wrote about the Toronto Erotica Writers and Readers Meetup. It was delightful meeting her then and getting reacquainted when we did that panel. And since then, I’ve had more time to peruse her writing on both sites and it is most enjoyable. 

How did you get into blogging?
Ten years ago, I was in university when a friend introduced me to Diaryland, a sort of precursor to LiveJournal’s write-your-emotions phenomenon. Diaryland allowed me to barf my feelings all over the Internet, and taught me a few valuable lessons, like how to do some basic HTML, and how to navigate the real-world repercussions of talking smack about people online.

I launched Hipsters Are Boring in 2009, with the express interest in writing about, not just myself and my emotions, but the world around me. I wanted to write about movies, books and articles, politics, Toronto, fashion, and filter it through my own personal snack machine. I also wanted an online portfolio of writing I could send around when I was applying for freelance writing gigs and internships, and a blog is a really good, straight-forward way to have that.

Are hipsters really boring?
Ha! That came from my very first post, which was a ragey response to Chuck Klosterman’s ultra-hip Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs. 2009 was also the zenith/nadir of the hipster’s rise and backlash, where it seemed like everyone had a fashion blog and an electro band and was really into, like, artisan bitters, and I felt like I had things to say about that. I’ve probably mellowed on my hipster stance, but I still roll my eyes at a lot of things.

How did you get connected with xoxoamore?
I had met my editor Erika through friends, and she had launched XOXO a few months before. I was aware of what the blog was and I knew I wanted to be a part of it, so I accosted her at a holiday party and offered to write for her. She was gracious and welcoming, and a few weeks later, my first XO post went up.

What are your preferred topics to write on—in relation to sex?
I always enjoy the erotic/sexuality-related comic review I do every month. I have a relationship with The Beguiling, which helps me select new titles and turn me on to new authors or genres. They’re so fun to write, because the comic form is still considered a bit of a red-headed stepchild when it comes to erotica or memoir or fiction, and busting down those preconceptions is a lot of fun. There are some amazing, classic, sexy titles out there, and people who dismiss them as “just comics” are missing out.

I also really enjoy writing the Sex 101s, because they’re less personal—writing about vegan sexuality, for example, doesn’t prevent me from eating steak for dinner. It’s a neat glimpse into other people’s bedrooms, and writing them sometimes gives me ideas for new things I want to try or practices to avoid.

Please tell us about your Date Night features.
Writing a Date Night post forces you out of the house and into the world, which is sort of unusual for a sexuality-focused blog. I usually review new restaurants or bars—buzzy places that couples are likely to check out—and try to see them through the eyes of both a first date and a “oh thank god, we got a babysitter and have the night to ourselves,” committed-relationship type of thing. In addition to the standard price/vibe/service/tastiness considerations that most reviewers mention, I talk about things like noise levels, which can be an intimacy killer, and if the venue is more appropriate for a weeknight date or a weekend outing.

If you weren’t writing for xoxoamore, would you feature more sex-related content on your blog?
I think writing for xoxoamore has definitely given me an outlet to talk about sex, and I take advantage of that—I think I’m one of the blog’s more active contributors, and I take pride in writing on a range of topics. I like to keep Hipster Are Boring pretty general, so while sex is definitely a part of my content, I’m more likely to talk about a sex scandal or a reproductive rights issue, whereas xoxoamore allows me to approach it from a more personal, first-person place.

What would you like to be writing right now (instead of these answers)?
I just started watching Game of Thrones, so I can anticipate that ruining/heightening the next few weeks of my life. Also making and eating pumpkin pancakes.

What are you working on in the near future? 
I just started a writer’s group with a bunch of friends, so that’s going to be a lot of fun—we’re doing short and mid-length fiction, which I haven’t written in a while! I’d like to do more freelance writing, and broaden my scope in both sexuality-related writing and more general content. Although, I guess we’ll see—I understand Game of Thrones is a bit addictive? My goals are to write more—I feel so good when I’m writing—and to get paid to do it. Wish me luck!