Raise your hand if you have been or are in a long-term relationship.
Check.
Raise your hand if that relationship could use a little…reinvigorating?
Bueller?…Bueller?…
You can’t fool me! It is entirely natural for people who spend time in a long-term relationship to fall into ruts, become complacent or just lose track of themselves and their partner—even when their relationship is solid.
Fantastic erotica and erotica romance writer Kristina Wright comes to the rescue with Bedded Bliss: A Couple’s Guide to Lust Ever After from Cleis Press. This guide will help keep that spark burning with a unique combination of relatable advice and steamy stories.
Why do couples need a book like Bedded Bliss?
Couples need a book like Bedded Bliss because so many of the relationship guides currently on the market are either about finding a mate or fixing a broken marriage. I don’t know of any books that are about relationships that are already rock solid and steady, relationships that are running just fine but could use a little energy boost once in awhile. Bedded Bliss is about those relationships, whether newlyweds looking to hang onto the magic or well-established happy couples who are looking for ways to spice things up.
What are some of the common traps couples fall into?
The saying goes that familiarity breeds contempt, and that may be a little harsh, but I do think couples fall into the habit of neglecting each other the longer they’re together—not seeing each other, really seeing each other as they are today. We forget that even as we grow and change, our partner is also growing and changing. And while we may have asked all the questions when we were dating or first got married, it’s important to remember the answers may have changed, so it’s important to keep asking questions, keep talking, keep exploring and growing together.
Including erotic fiction is a different approach to a relationship guide. What inspired that decision?
I’m a fiction writer at heart and I’ve been writing erotica and erotic romance since 1999, so including erotic fiction in a relationship guide felt like a natural extension for me. Sex isn’t always the answer in a relationship, but quite often it leads to something better and stronger. Sex, intimacy, communication, they all go together. And while I talk quite a bit about my own marriage and what has worked for us to maintain a long and healthy relationship, I wanted this to be a hands-on book (pun fully intended) where couples could read the stories, find their own erotic inspiration and maybe add something to their own intimacy.
Did you pair specific writers to specific topics?
Oh yes! I hand-picked authors who are in long-term committed relationships and asked them to write stories based on either their own experiences or grounded in a particular stage of marriage they have already been through. Parents wrote about marriage and parenting, writers who have been married a couple of decades wrote about the middle-aged intimacy, etc. I also asked the authors to include a personal anecdote to introduce their stories. The end result is this wonderful mixed-genre book of advice, erotica and memoir. Who better to share lusty stories of maintaining a committed relationship than erotica writers who are in committed relationships?
Is there one key element common to successfully reconnecting?
I think the best advice for reconnecting is to never get disconnected. At the end of the day, it’s about the two people in the relationship—and I try to reinforce that truth throughout Bedded Bliss. Whatever works in a relationship is what works for those two people who committed to each other—no one else gets a say. It’s maintaining the connection through consistent communication that is key to long term success.
