I can only imagine how many times Yulia Petrauskas has been asked to be someone’s Dominant. If you were to count them in spanks, you’d not likely be able to sit for the rest of the day. With a win as Best Actress in a Short Film at the Fetisch Film Festival, Yulia brings us to a day in the life of Dominatrix Severija in her short film Da Kink In My Lair, screening this week at the International Fetish Film Festival.
I chatted with Yulia, and you can also catch a longer interview tonight on Sex City! Listen here at 11pm ET.
What inspired Da Kink in My Lair?
Well…lol. A few reasons… I’ve been approached countless times, by men (and women), either asking if I am a dom, or that I should get into becoming a dom, and if I would please, please, pretty please be their dom, Mistress Yulia-oh-oh-goddess-domina-I-will-buy-you-shoes-here’s-my-credit-card, lol. A few years earlier, before I made the short, or even had the concept, I was dating someone quite toxic, who did dom work on the side…among (ahem!)…other things. This was unsettling to me, not the doming part. I often use humour to work through whatever difficulties I have in life. I feel that we can either allow these experiences to consume us, or use them as creative fuel or tools to become more enlightened. As a story teller, my job is to capture the truth and bare the vulnerability that most people fear in order to help give a voice to those that don’t always have one. The sensuality and mystery of the human condition has always enticed me. Examining this element of human nature always keeps me questioning, why? Art and interpretation lie in the eye of the beholder. I find it fascinating to walk in someone else’s shoes. I’ve discovered that I learn so much more when I step outside myself, and into the vulnerability and life of another person. This project for me initially was an experiment. It was a huge risk artistically, as it is my first directorial endeavour.
Do you think this sort of documentary/reality show could actually be a success?
Oh, for sure! Actually, Andy Gras (he started the Fetisch Film Festival in Kiel Germany, and is one of the major reasons why there is even a festival happening in Toronto) was the first person to even give my film a chance and has been so warm, encouraging and nurturing this whole time, said from the start that I should make it into a feature. I’m toying with the idea of turning it into a mini web series…6 episodes or so—it’s more appealing to me. There are so many outside elements that dictate whether or not the project gets made—financial being the biggest one. By focusing on short films and web series rather than features, allows for a lot more freedom as an artist, especially with budget limitations or those who are starting out.
What did you do to learn about the lives of dominatrixes?
I had previously known some doms—and again, I’ve also been approached, so the research was quite effortless. It consisted of meeting up for coffee, countless hours of gabbing, and visiting some dungeons. In one case, a “subject” (ahem) invited me to her apartment and I was able to learn a lot over turkish coffee and stuffed peppers, just prior to her client coming over for his routine visit… Oh, who am I kidding—she told me to hide on her patio, lol. So I ate the stuffed pepper while I waited…
Do you think the lives of those in sex and pleasure work will ever be commonplace?
It all depends because there are so many regional and cultural differences and restrictions that come into play, so to speak. What is socially acceptable in one country may not be socially acceptable in another.
It all depends because there are so many regional and cultural differences and restrictions that come into play, so to speak. What is socially acceptable in one country may not be socially acceptable in another.
Although we’re making progress globally, we still have a far way to go to make it the social norm. The world is constantly evolving, and just like any change that has come before us, there are challenges that will be overcome.
What projects are you working on that we can look forward to?
I just finished shooting a web series with a handful of my comedy friends called The Fame Show—a sketch comedy and mock-reality TV show about two self absorbed wanna-be celebrities.
