Defining Losing Virginity

How do you define your “first time?” Is it through penis + vagina intercourse? What if you’re queer? What actions or emotions do you attribute to this act or acts?

Kate Monro, author of Losing It: How we popped our cherry over the last 80 years has interviewed numerous people about their experiences. After checking out the article, I am very keen to read the book. My own friends have told such a variety of experiences over the years that I think we might all have different versions of virginity.